Satoshi-Era Whale Wakes Up With $84M

January 16–22, 2026 | Market Mood: 😐 Confused, Twitchy, and Not Having Fun

You don’t sit on a wallet since 2011, then suddenly move 909 BTC the week of an FOMC decision, unless you’re making a statement.

A Bitcoin wallet dormant for 13 years just sent 909.38 BTC (~$84.6M) in one shot.

  • Cost basis: ~$7

  • Unrealized gain: ~1,390,000%

It survived Mt. Gox, China bans, two market cycles, and two U.S. presidents — and only woke up now.

👉🏼 Why it matters: The BTC didn’t hit an exchange. It was sent to a modern SegWit (bech32) wallet — meaning the holder (or heir) is alive, knows what they’re doing, and is exploring options… not panicking.

👉🏼 Why now: BTC sits near $91K, well below its $124K peak. OGs with near-zero cost don’t need hopium ,  they need clean exits.

🫤 Bottom line: Not bullish. Not bearish. Just a signal: the old whales still watch… and they don’t move for nothing.

👀 Markets will be tracking this wallet like a hawk.

💀 THIS WEEK IN CHAOS

Bitcoin dropped under $88K… then bounced near $90K after Trump eased up on tariffs at Davos. The asset didn’t change, the headlines did.
👉 Trade the news or get traded by it. 

Over $500M in Tether just got traced back to Iran’s central bank. They're likely propping up the Rial and dodging dollars.
👉 USDT isn’t just a stablecoin, it’s global duct tape now.

Bitmine added 35K+ ETH ($108M) even as ETH dipped below $3K. They’re now holding 4.2M ETH total.
👉 Smart money loves red candles. Always has.

Authorities just seized $11.4M more from the OneCoin scam. The Cryptoqueen’s long gone… but the cleanup ain’t.
👉 Scams don’t die. They just quietly rot.

MicroStrategy bought another $2.1B in BTC — 22,305 coins at an average of ~$76K. That brings their stack to 709K BTC.
👉 Saylor’s not buying dips. He’s buying dominance.

🧪 Poll of the Week: “Very Soon™” vs. Reality

At Davos, President Trump said he hopes to sign a crypto market structure bill “very soon.” Back home, Congress is still stuck in a food fight.

Between Coinbase, the banking lobby, and stablecoin rules, the window for real reform is already closing, and a two-year delay is on the table.

If this drags, lawmakers risk doing what the U.S. does best: exporting innovation and importing regret. So what actually happens next?

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👉 Vote wisely. Policy moves slower than markets, but the consequences last longer.

📚 RESOURCES WE LIKED THIS WEEK

Read smarter. Panic less. Or panic better.

🏭 America’s Biggest Profit Engines (2026)

Who’s actually printing money right now and who’s living off vibes. Clean breakdown of the fastest-growing U.S. sectors heading into 2026.

⛏️ Top Cryptocurrency Mining Pools: Full Guide

Hashrate, fees, payouts, risks — no nostalgia mining fluff. If you’re still pointing rigs at random pools, this fixes that fast.

🛢️ Venezuela’s Frozen Billions & U.S. Energy Stocks

Sanctions, debt, oil, and why locked-up Venezuelan money suddenly matters for U.S. equities. Sneaky macro link most traders miss.

🕵️ No-KYC vs. Travel Rule: Crypto Privacy in 2026

Privacy isn’t dead, it’s just heavily monitored. This breaks down what’s still possible, what’s risky, and what’s pure copium.

📊This Week’s Big Movers

Epic bouncers, super slides, and tokens that pumped like there’s no tomorrow.

👆 Saakuru [SKR] +2692% 👆 MovieDOM Token [MDOM] +1319% 👆 CATX [CATX] +648%

👆 Surge [SURGE] +236% 👆 DUSK [DUSK] +219% 👆 Axie Infinity [AXS] +132%

👆 River [RIVER] +100%  👆 Canton [CC] +13% 👆 Sky [SKY] +9%

👇 ARI [ARI] -95% 👇 Felis [FELIS] -94% 👇 CUPSEY [CUPSEY] -87% 

👇 Prom [PROM] -66% 👇 The White Whale [WHITEWHALE] -53% 👇 Vision [VSN] -31%

👇 Monero [XMR] -26% 👇 Ethena [ENA] -21% 👇 Internet Computer Protocol [ICP] -19%

🔮 What to Watch Next Week

Short fuse. Big consequences.

🏦 FOMC takes the mic (Jan 27–28)
Powell speaks as CPI cools and rate-cut fantasies creep back in.
👉 Dovish tone = risk-on pop. Hawkish surprise = fast flush.

🏛️ CLARITY Act markup (Jan 27)
Senate pushes crypto structure toward the CFTC.
👉 Progress matters. Delays don’t.

📊 Macro Midweek
PMIs, GDP, PCE all hit.
👉 Expect chop. Size down.

💻 Big Tech Earnings
Tesla, Microsoft, Meta, Apple report as AI hype meets reality.
👉 Weak guidance hits risk. Strong AI spend lifts beta.

🔓 Token unlocks loom
ZRO, JUP, BGB, H and others unlock into thin post-Davos liquidity.
👉 Supply > demand short term. Don’t marry bags into unlock week.

👀 Translation: Trade the catalysts, not the vibes.

🤣THE MEMEING OF LIFE

LATEST GAINERS 📈

STOCKS

Source: barchart.com

MICRO VOLUME CRYPTO

CRYPTO

LATEST LOSERS 📈

STOCKS

Source: barchart.com

MICRO VOLUME CRYPTO

CRYPTO

👀 SPOT THE FAKE

QUICK QUIZ: CHOOSE THE FAKE IMAGE

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🔔 Stay sharp, trade smart, and remember: The market doesn’t care about your feelings. See you next time! 🚀

⚠️ Disclaimer: Not financial advice. Do your research before making any trades.